Do Magick 30 Day Challenge- Transition Meditations Day 19

Results: I tried the Om Gam Ganapatye Svahaa mantra before my yoga workout yesterday. I've been trying to do exercise to sculpt my body in a direction that will assist in my transition. Midst of doing my usual workout, I think I need to start working out like a woman, not like a man. I get a burst of energy and finish my usual routine, throw in a few more exercises, and then do half a cycle of a more advanced exercise set. It was pretty powerful. I don't know if this was from the mantra or from the meditations, or some combination thereof, but if I can keep powering through like that, I'm gonna get fit quick.

Body: Usual affirmations. I've been slowing down some to ensure I hit all the parts in order with repetition, going from part to part, then doing the whole of the macro part. Ex) toes, soles, arch, heel, ankle, FOOT.

Mind: I went with moments I felt joyous to be feminine, throwing in some applause, fireworks, etc. It does feel good for me, like I'm throwing off weights I'm constantly forced to be carrying. Relieving and thrilling at the same time. Freeing.

Soul: My descent in was mountains. Big, big mountains. Usually I count down from ten to get in, but this was prolonged, the scope of each mountain growing from merely large to cosmic scales, the last mountain being the size of the solar system. When I finally reached the end, a face made of stars greeted me, a version of my cosmic self. It was all logic discussion from there. Am I male, female, something in between?

I've often wondered if I'm more gender fluid than fully male to female, which frustrated me in the past as I don't know what to do with it. Male to female has a plan. Gender fluid is more like a lack there of. Truthfully, I feel like I'm on more of a trajectory toward more feminine, and I'd be remiss to not take that as far as I can. While I certainly have male aspects and interests, like it or not, I cannot stay still.

It would be unhealthy to not admit I have these masculine traits. It would be equally unhealthy to let there presence hold me back from being the woman I want to be.

Results: Feeling sort of calm and contemplative, feminine, but not in some overbearing artificial way. It's like background noise or atmosphere. It just is, without having to force it's way out front saying, look at me! Feeling oddly chilled out.